1) my cat feels weirdly guilty for not liking cilantro. cilantro opens into a sadness of consumption. when you sweat through your paws the in-laws know where you’ve been.
2) my cat feels a fear of intimacy when I try to hug her. her hugs are slow blinks. her slow blinks light the other side of the room.
3) my cat’s career has flat-lined. lines of texts are going to fill her with a desire to kill birds, but birds are not the enemy.
4) my cat doesn’t drive. driving requires a lack of determination. she’s nothing if not determined.
5) it’s bow-tie thursday.
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Alex Niemi is Iowa City's TRUE Russian Blue, and she speaks, like, 4 languages--how about you?!